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Les Parents Terribles

My parents get here in 2 days. The Full Metal Freakout has not yet occurred, but I am a little bomb tick-tick-ticking away. I’ve got a near full bottle of Valium and half a bottle of Vicodin at the ready. It’s very reassuring having these kinds of prescriptions around, I have to say. I am hoping not to dip into either of those bottles, but just to be safe, I’ve moved them from the back of the cupboard to the front. When you badly need a tranquilizer, the last thing you want to do is spend more than 30 seconds looking for one.

I have been receiving around 2 to 3 emails a week from my mother, and in each message she says something like, “I’m so excited to see you!” in this faux, deliriously happy tone. She is so NOT that way in real life; she is mean and angry most of the time. I have been tempted to reply to one of her messages with a terse “manage your expectations” since the reality of her seeing me cannot possibly live up to any of her delusional expectations... but I haven’t sent that sort of message off because it is nasty. Sheesh, it is so exhausting taking the high road and training yourself to act instead of react. It’s a lot easier to deal when you’re thousands of miles away.

Anyway, they will be here 5 days. Then, once they’re done torturing me, they are off to the Pyrénées to work on my aunt’s house, and entertain a bunch of American friends. My mother always hated the house (because she hated my aunt) but now that it’s hers, she’s become the bourgeoise chatelaine and it is so irritating. Who knows what kind of useless and ruinous renovations she will undertake.


It’s kind of chilly today so when I got home after a stroll through the Marais, I made hot chocolate with mini marshmallows in it. The marshmallows were part of a care package I received in May. The package also contained chocolate rice krispies, and I was supposed to make rice krispy treats, but the cereal didn’t last that long. It’s a good thing marshmallows have a Twinkie shelf life of infinity.

5:30 p.m. - 2001-09-09



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