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rue-madame's Diaryland Diary

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Razzle dazzlin' 'em

I just got back from showing my portfolio. It went well.

I wore a red sleeveless t-shirt that is very flattering and my trampypants. I donít think they even noticed my cute outfit. No matter. I noticed theirs. The guy was wearing shoes that looked like slippers and nail polish. I didnít think men still wore nail polish! Is it even remotely subversive at this point in time? The woman wore a flowery tunic over pants, and had dyed orange hair.

They were both really nice and knowledgeable about publishing and printing. Such a relief after so many interviews where the potential client exhibits zero knowledge or comprehension. Phew! And the project sounds really interesting and Iím kinda excited about it.

Now I just need to estimate how much the cover design should be. I hate this part. I need to go to the bookstore down the street, to sneak a peek at the Graphic Artists Guild Handbook. The book has ballpark figures for all sorts of design, and the edition that I have is from Ď94. Time to upgrade.

When the guy asked me what a general figure would be, he ventured, ďbear in mind that weíre not Disney. We donít have that much money. I mean, I may be able to afford, like, $3.Ē

At that, I said, ďThree bucks? Well then, the deal is off.Ē

Man, I crack myself up.

I figure, what the hell do I have to lose? Itís not like I have work right now anyway. Terence and I have both been channeling this guy Alan that we used to know in San Francisco. He would always say ďcanít hurt; might helpĒ and itís a great mantra to use when your inner critic rears his/her hideous mien or when youíre feeling less than confident.

Iíve been using it for a while in yoga, and I think itís really helped my practice. It also helps that the teachers at my yoga studio are always encouraging the students to go beyond what they think theyíre capable of, to tempt gravity and just fall over. Who cares if you fall over? Youíre not really going to hurt yourself and itís liberating pushing yourself to the point of looking ridiculous. I always laugh at myself in class when I try to go past my ďsafeĒ boundary--I always end up on my ass. For me, this happens in vasisthasana whether Iím doing the crazy foot in hand version, or the regular balancing sideways version.

Terence wants me to help him make dinner. He gets so excited about pea soup, itís ridiculous. My job will be salad, and perhaps dessert.

5:40 p.m. - 2003-02-06

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