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rue-madame's Diaryland Diary

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Everyone's a critic

I ate a hot-dog at The Hulk world premiere. And it was very tasty--just enough mustard, just enough relish.

Other highlights of the evening included:

- seeing a free movie on a gigantor-sized screen

- a huge and refreshing Hulk-sized vodka tonic after the show

- rice krispy treats and cupcakes with green icing

- sauntering down the red carpet (which was actually green, and probably recycled from The Grinch) and pretending to be important while a bunch of rabid fans screamed and hooted. So long, suckers!

I could have touched these celebrities because they were literally at armís length: Alyson Hannigan, Tom Lenk (Andrew from Buffy,) Jon Voigt, that chick from JAG who was also at this other event I attended, and Jason Biggs.

Thank god we got there early to avoid the media blitz. The carpet was free and clear when we walked to the theater. The carpet, btw, was divided in two: one side for nobodies, one side for celebrities anxious to get some press.

On the nobodies side, there was an impenetrable wall of people to the left, all standing around behind a barricade, waiting to catch a glimpse of a famous person. Iím telling you, it was really trippy. Like being an animal on parade.

I walked with good posture.

The celebrity side of the carpet was lined with a phalanx of reporters, cameras, photographers, and lights. I am convinced that the reason you always see celebrities (couples and non) holding hands at these things is because the wall of media is fucking scary. Your name is called from every direction, everybody wants you to stop and chat, or stop and pose, itís like being a piece of meat. Meanwhile your publicist is tugging at your sleeve, trying to steer you to the better outlets...

When youíre famous, and you choose to walk down that side of the carpet, you kind of have to sleep in the bed youíve made. Thatís the trade-off.

Oh, and the movie? Not bad, but not great either. The worst part for me was the music--in the desert scenes, the soundtrack veers into middle eastern territory (what? because of the sand? the landscape?) which seemed trite and ham-handed to me.

But what do I know?

3:55 p.m. - 2003-06-18

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