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rue-madame's Diaryland Diary

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Or maybe it's fleas...

The project I’m working on right now is interesting because I am merely “tweaking” someone else’s work. And if by “tweak” you mean “dramatically change for the better,” then I am indeed “tweaking.” These layouts are supposed to look “more Teen Vogue, less Teen Beat” (editor’s words) and I sure as hell hope I’ve approached whatever hip-to-mainstream dream ratio the publisher had in mind.

I’m crossing my fingers.

Personally I think my “tweaked” design looks like a cross between Teen Vogue and Allure. It’s kind of hard to determine if I’ve pushed the color/typography/balance between busy and quiet enough. Or If I’ve gone totally off the deep-end commercial/downmarket-wise.

It’s been really fun for me to work on, since at heart, I am a tomboy-ish 11 year old girl with a sophisticated streak. The audience is definitely teenage (so that works for me), but it’s probably more midwestern podunk than coastal urban which is why I want the design not to be too uptown if you catch my drift. There should be some H&M or expensive lipgloss tossed in with the Abercrombie and Clearasil.

I have a little downtime and should probably finish up my website, but it is so hard to get motivated. I have been so daydreamy lately! Thinking about all the different things I could be doing, beating myself up about treading water in my career, wondering if I’ve got it in me to go back to school, fantasizing about just getting a Director position with a salary and health benefits, considering Socrates’ famous quote “An unexamined life is not worth living” and wondering if I examine too little or too much? Do I live in the shadows or am I outside the cave?

This is what the suburbs do to me. It’s not necessarily a bad thing; maybe I’m meant to have these moments where I take stock, beat myself up, feel like a loser, feel ok with my life decisions? I don’t often vacillate but when I do, it really throws me for a loop. I’m trying to pretend it’s like surfing or snowboarding, that I just have to relax a little bit so I can handle the bumps.

Or maybe it’s just PMS and I need to fucking chill.

5:30 p.m. - 2006-07-10

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