rue-madame's Diaryland
Diary
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
The Anti-Plan life plan
I�ve lately been debating about whether or not to complete the Diaryland list-o-rama in the Profile section.I�ve actually attempted on several occasions to fill in favorite movies and music and authors, but every time I get to the bottom, I panic and delete everything. Committment issues much? I don�t know what it is about publishing my favorites, but I have not been able to do it. I will keep on, keeping on, and as soon as I conquer my fear, I will let everyone know. I have these very adult friends who have actual 3 and 5 year plans. They are all typed up, and every now and then, they consult them to see how they�re doing. Of course, I have no such plan. It�s kind of like a Favorite Life list, and if I can�t set down in stone what my favorite movie is, do you think I can create the stone tablet of my Life? No way. My plan is the anti-plan. It�s not written down, it�s just sort of free-floating in my head, and it goes a little like this: WORK Do what you�re doing until you don�t like it anymore, then quit. Don�t worry about not having another job lined up. One will come along since by quitting, you�ve just made room for a new, better opportunity. Sometimes you have to knock down the building in front of you to see the glorious view. LOVE Don�t look for it; it will find you. Of course it helps to have clear idea of what traits are important to you, then make sure you don�t settle for anything less. Have fun, but be realistic. MONEY It may not grow on trees, but there are ways to make it�some more glamorous than others. Do not let fear of not having any make you stay in a job or relationship that you find intolerable. I believe in Chance and Accidents, and I don�t think it�s possible to rid your life of them. I also have to confess that there�s a part of me that really believes in karma , and that if you put good things out there, good things will come back to you. Those 3 and 5 year plans seem too rigid to me. I can�t imagine writing a plan down, consulting it 2 years later, and realizing I haven�t done shit towards my goal. What then? I would feel like a total failure! Is there a back-up plan in case you don�t stick to a schedule? I like my anti-plan because I neither feel disappointed by my choices nor where those choices lead. It�s funny that this entry is so philosophical. I just got an email from a friend who called me an Existentialist ( he asked me if I was �loving life� and I replied that �I don't know that I would qualify my attitude as "loving life" since I never feel that way, but things are going well.�) If that�s Existentialist, then I guess I am. And I�ve got the black turtleneck to prove it. PS: I just realized that my "unwritten anti-plan" has now been written. I may now be cursed.
5:09 p.m. - 2001-09-10
|
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
previous - next
|
