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rue-madame's Diaryland Diary

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Numbers 1 through 7 where I go off

Number One

“The Truth About Charlie” is a matinée. Do not spend $9 on the movie. You will feel ripped off. Thandie Newton is gorgeous, and they dress her Audrey-style so there is some connection between the film and the original “Charade.” She slips and slides around Paris in her little kitten heels. In “Charade,” Audrey had great chemistry with Cary Grant; not so with Thandie and Mark Wahlberg, who “mysteriously” pops up in a beret. A beret! He looks ridiculous! The art direction is cool, though. And the movie features an appearance by one of my favorite French pop artists, Philippe Katerine. He’s like the millenial Jacques Dutronc.

Number Two

Spoon was great last night. Some guy in the audience beforehand was all, “Spoon and Bright Eyes were the discovery of the last 6 months.” Yeah, right. Your 6 months! Anyway, inspired by Gingeryette’s lament yesterday about not being able to see because of monoliths blocking her view, I was proactively anti-tall person. I really dislike confrontation (really, who enjoys it?) and most of the time, all I do is complain. Big surprise. But not last night! No! I had a good spot, I could see the musicians from head to toe, when all of a sudden, some Felicity with a long neck comes and stands right in front of me! Overlapping her personal space with mine! So she looks about, feigns sheepishness, and turns her head towards the stage. So I tap her on the shoulder, and she looks at me like, “What? Me?” then proceeds to tell me a little story about how she “was” standing over there (signals to area to the left but in front of me) and she was just “trying” to get back to where she was before. So I give her my arch “Are you fucking serious?” look, and she looks at me sort of startled. I say, “Do you think you could stand behind me since you’re taller, that way we can both see?” And she looks so shocked, and MOVES TO STAND BEHIND ME! I won! I got to see the show without human interference. And actually so did Felicity girl.

Later, when we were leaving, Hilary came up to me and was in awe that I actually said something to the taller chick. “You’re a bad-ass! You scared her! She should know better than to fuck with you! That was almost an skirmish!” Yeah, a skirmish at a Spoon show, that’s what I’m after.

Number Three

The Giants rallied and won last night’s World Series game. Now they’re tied 2-2 with the Angels, so there’s still a chance they can win the Series. I sat and watched most of the game with Terence, confirming his suspicion that I am the good luck charm. I’m really only the J. T. Snow charm, tickled as I am by his soft hands at first base. If it’s possible to have a crush on a baseball player, then I have one. Tickle me with your soft hands, dammit. Now. I don't care if you're married with a 4.5 year old. That never stopped Babe Ruth (but why would anyone want to sleep with him? Blech.)

Number Four

Kidding, Terence.

Number Five

I invoiced a client $1500 two months ago for a completed project. About a month later, I received a check for $500. I send an email saying, “Hey, that’s only part of it, what’s going on, blahblahblah” and they respond with “Oh, sorry, we’ll look into it, oh, hey, look at that, oops, we’re sending another right out to you.” Another month goes by, and a check in the amount of $500 arrives in the mail. At this point, the new I’m Mad As Hell And I’m Not Going To Take It Anymore Rue-Madame gets pissed off and sends this email:

Dear So-and-so,

I did receive a check, only it was for half of the amount owed.

There is still a balance of $500 outstanding from the first invoice. Do you

know how much longer it will be before this invoice is paid? I am not in the

habit of barraging people with emails to get compensated for completed work, so

can we clear this matter up quickly? I don't want to have to take this to the

next step.

Thanks.

A few hours go by, and suprise! I get a phone call. And the editor, sounding angry, “confides” in me that they had to let their bookkeeper go, they’ve never had to do that before, and it’s been traumatic, and the books are all out of sorts, blahblahblah, that’s the reason I’ve been paid in drips and drabs. Like I care. Like it’s my business or concern. Like, that makes me feel really confident about them and their practices. She says that I will be paid the remainder in 10 days. Oh and by the way, there’s another book that will need production, the manuscript’s almost finished, she’ll call me when it’s ready to go. Yeah, like I’m really going to do business with a failing company that takes three months to pay me $1500 for finished work.

Number Six

All of that fuss with my sisters to organize a brunch for my mother’s birthday, and little sister (that’s sister number 2) never showed. We ate without her. She was supposed to be at my parents’ house at 10:30 am to help out, and she didn’t call with an explanation until 3:30 in the afternoon, using one of her stock “dog ate my homework” excuses. By the time she arrived, everyone was gone (including me) and she bemoaned the fact that she has a bad reputation when it came to committments and family functions. Oh cry me a fucking river already. Maybe you have a bad rep because you're always late and always have some flimflam reason? I will quote once again my famous Aunt Corinne who once remarked "There's no excuse for bad manners" and ain't that the truth. Ruth.

Number Seven

I am not taking shit lying down this week. I’d better read my horoscope and find out what the deal is.

9:38 a.m. - 2002-10-24

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