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rue-madame's Diaryland Diary






Art opening downtown. Another one of those low-brow art/illustration shows where everyone stands around, posing, looking cool. There was neither alcohol, nor food, nor music. Who has an art reception without snacks? Without wine? Without music? What the fuck? I mean, if you donít want to have a party, donít send out invitations! I know I said I would reject these things in 2003, but I cannot reject without information.

Afterwards, a bunch of us went to a bar/cafť downtown called Peteís and it was actually really nice. An old turn of the century building with a dark-wood bar and my favorite type of octagonal tile on the floor (the kind thatís prevalent in French bistros, must be a turn-of-the-century decorative thing.) Neither Terence nor I had a red cent between us, and I was too embarassed to say that when the idea of getting a drink was suggested; I figured weíd just go along and check it out and let destiny takes its course. Well, that destiny announced itself in a balloon glass of merlot and finances be damned! It tasted delicious. Terence had a beer and I think we both telepathically agreed that two drinks would be ok and weíd cover it with some good old fashioned deficit spending. Then as we got up to leave we realized that someone had already taken care of the bill...

Our friends always do that. Theyíre like our guardian angels, fairy godmothers, always buying us coffees and food and paying for movie rentals, etc. I think weíd have already starved by now were it not for their kindness. Weíre always bowing out of functions and pay-as-you-go activities due to our financial straights, so it was nice to momentarily feel like we had the social lives of People With Jobs.

A woman we were with pointed out that the building across the street from the bar was the building used for the bank in ďCatch Me If You Can.Ē She was an extra in the movie, and even showed us the doorway into which she walks during her 8 seconds of screen time. Pretty cool. Iíve mentioned that I really liked that movie, right?

After the bar, more drinking and music listening, this time provided by Harriet.




I had the book club meeting. We discussed The Lion, The Witch and The Wardrobe. My god, I love that book. Iím going to have to return to the library for all of the other ones. Iíve been on a real kidsí literature kick lately, reading that as well as From The Mixed-Up Files of Mrs. Basil E. Frankweiler. And I love going to the kidsí section at the actual library. All of the bookshelves are the perfect height for me! I hardly ever have to use the step-ladder.

Iíve decided Iím going to stop attending the book club meetings. They invariably heighten my sense of alienation. The thing is, the book club is really just a pretext for getting together with folks and hanging out--itís more of a social thing than a literary thing, and thatís perfectly fine *if you are friends with all of the people in the club and you look forward to seeing them once every month or so.* My issue is that I only feel ďfriendsĒ with one person, the rest I donít really connect with, and I always feel like no one Ďgetsí me and that Iím an outsider. Today I decided that my attendance is counter-productive for me, and that no one in the group will miss my contributions.

I feel pretty relieved actually. I no longer have to schedule ego deflation by other people. I can continue bruising my self-esteem on my own thankyouverymuch.

In other news, I think Iíve decided to go back to school. I got a lecture from Terence yesterday, and he convinced me that I should go because a) Iíd love it, b) Iíd succeed, c) Iíd learn something new that Iíve always been passionate about, and d) if not now, when?

I am going to attempt to transition from graphic design to fashion design, specifically to accessories (shoes + bags) design. Iím probably going to rue the day I posted that information here, but too late now. If Iím going to commit to a change, I may as well be out about it.

So there you have it. A quasi life-changing resolution for 2003. Thatís the news around these parts.

12:47 p.m. - 2003-01-20



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