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rue-madame's Diaryland Diary

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Good day, Sunshine!

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Please sign my guestbook or leave me a note if you know how to procure tickets to see The Shins at Yale University. Thank you!
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Boring ANTM business out of the way first:
Ooh, Miss Tyra was sooo mad the other night! She was totally screaming with her furrowed Botox-free brow and her krazy kolor hair flying around! That was some good reality tv. It actually made me cry a wee bit. I was so sad for the two losers, but especially for Tiffany who wasn’t able to rise above and kick ass. She really needed that Black Flag song on constant rotation in her head: Rise above! We’re gonna rise above!

I totally want to buy this. It’s the exact machine the physical therapist has been using to treat my broken knees. Today I asked him about the settings he was inputting (103 watts/cm for 6 minutes) and told him I was going to buy one on Ebay. Of course there’s the teensy weensy matter of not being a licensed professional, but I’m sure there’s a way around that. I mean, it’s for personal use! I’m not going to open a Physical Therapy office or anything. I know how to put gel on the head of the wand and massage my ligaments! I watched the PT do it and it ain’t no brain surgery.

I finally have an appointment with my podiatrist next week. It’s at 7:45 am (this is the time slot you get when the receptionist says “how about April 29th?” and you blurt out an anguished “There’s nothing sooner?”) I am going to put together a list of questions because I always forget something. I need to know how long the surgery will take, how long it will be before I can walk, how long it will be before I can do yoga, how long it will take before I can sport normal shoes, which of course leads into “Will I have to have crutches? A hideous moon shoe?” and “When can I buy myself some new celebratory cute and unsupportive slingbacks?”

What else? My mother was (predictably) an asshole about TA getting into grad school. I guess we must be trying to steal her grad school thunder or something? GOD! She is so fucking irritating! Maybe she’s pissed because we’re still not married? And definitely not pregnant? You know, sometimes I think it’s good to be alive but an equal amount of times, I think, “My mother never should have had children. Someone should have told her that motherhood was OPTIONAL.” I’m not advocating eugenics or anything. I’m just saying… unbalanced people should get their heads sorted out before they fuck up future generations.

That’s all.

2:01 p.m. - 2005-04-15

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