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rue-madame's Diaryland Diary

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There's no excuse for bad manners

Dear rue-madame and her older sister,

I apologize for not letting you know sooner, but things have been really crazy for me for the last few weeks (what with working 2 jobs again.) I also regret the fact that I have to do this over email, but it seems that this is the most efficient way to reach both of you!

Well here goes Ė New Boyfriend and I eloped and got married on the beach in Mexico while we were on vacation. We got married on Friday March 31st at sunset; we were barefoot in the sand and it was beautiful. Just when you think youíll never wear a bridesmaidís dress twice Ė think again (thatís what I wore!) Iíve included a few photos in the email for you. Iím very happy and look forward to when you both can meet him. Heís really great and probably the best thing thatís ever happened to me.

His family is also very nice Ė theyíve welcomed me into their fold with open arms. Iíve already had to learn about 20 names and apparently thatís only the tip of the iceberg. We will have a wedding here in SF sometime in the near future Ė weíre planning on getting married at Saint Whateverís church (the same one where our parents met.) The date has not been set yet, but thatís sure to happen soon. We should know soon since we will be meeting with the priest in a few weeks and weíll probably be able to reserve the date then.

Sorry to have to announce it to you like this, but I couldnít figure out how else to do it!

Love, YoungerSister

PS: Iím also in the process of changing my name. It will be YoungerSister HusbandsLastName in a matter of a couple of weeks. I think that my email at work will automatically redirect messages to my new email address, but just in case it doesnít, you can email me at blahblahblahNewLastNamedotcom.

Hereís what I really want to know:

1. An email three weeks after the fact is the best way to reach me? I have 2 phone numbers, and 5 email accounts which I check compulsively.
2. If it was an elopement, why was a) your hair perfectly styled, b) your makeup expertly applied, c) your outfits matching, and why was the whole affair d) captured by a professional photographer? I didnít realize elopements were soÖ elaborately orchestrated?
3. Why have you taken to wearing a cross around your neck? Are you going to have to be Confirmed before you can advance to the next sacrament? I do not understand this sudden religiosity. What name are you going with for the Confirmation? Or do you not know yet because your husband hasnít picked it for you? (ouch, that was uncalled for!)
4. Do you really think that you are any busier than either of us (I run my own company and work 6-7 days a week, OlderSister is the CFO of a non-profit and routinely clocks 15 hour days,) so busy that you couldnít spare 5 minutes to tell us over the phone? I donít understand the need for such secrecy, especially considering you all but announced your engagement to the WORLD on MySpace and Friendster.
5. Letís face it: was it really the busyness of two jobs? Or was it cowardice? Are we such shitty sisters that we donít even deserve the courtesy of respect or grace? Do you truly ďregretĒ using email to convey this message, or are you privately relieved?

Of course that is not what I replied. Never let it be said that 7 years of yoga have not taught me some important lessons in how to observe what Iím feeling, process those emotions, then throw them away (or post them on this diary) if I find them to be counter-productive or emotionally destructive.

I said this instead:

Congratulations, LittleSister! Those photos are adorable, you both look thrilled to pieces. Happy news indeed. Can't wait to meet this mysterious HisLastName character.

xo rue-madame

ps: I hope you and NewHusband will be moving into a new apartment. It would be such a shame to burden a new beginning with the bad juju at StreetName.

7:27 p.m. - 2006-04-22

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